Live Well, Stress Less

Monday morning, I got up and was having a leisurely morning. Everything was lovely until I checked my email. My neighbor, Susan, has sent me an email say that she had noticed my car had a flat tire as she left for work. She wanted me to know in advance of heading out to my car. I appreciated the heads up. But what I did next was rather embarrassing now that I look back at it. I started creating a story about how much the tire was going to cost and how I didn’t want to spend money on a tire. How I didn’t want to deal with it. I whined about having to call AAA and go to the tire store. I fretted about how if I needed to buy one tire, I would need to buy two to keep the wheels balanced. I stressed about the cost.

Then I finally decided to handle it. I called AAA. The guy who came was quick and efficient. He pointed out that there was a nail in the tire and it could be patched for a very small fee.

I went to the tire store where I had recently bought 2 tires for the car. And after about a half hour, the guy called me forward and asked if I bought the tires there. I was honest and said that I had bought the two front tires at his store but the tire that had the flat was original equipment on my car. He smiled and handed me my keys and said, “Come back and buy the back tires when you need them and have a nice day. No charge today!”

I smiled as I drove home and then started to laugh. I had spent 2 hours in drama about something that didn’t happen. I created a story in my head that caused me to be stressed. I did it to myself (darn it)!

How often do we create stress by creating stories that never happen? I’m going to try to catch myself next time before the train leaves the station and say, “Just stay with what you know right now. Don’t project out about something you know nothing about! Don’t do it to yourself!”

| Tags: creating stress, Flat Tire, self created stress, stories | Category: Reporting In, Stress, Uncategorized | Leave a comment

Ran across this clip on Yahoo!  If you need some exercise motivation–check out this pup!

| Tags: animal videos, dogs, Exercise, pet tricks | Category: Exercise, Inspiration | Leave a comment

Sadie and I had a scary experience on our walk today. She is over it.  I am still trying to shake it off.   We were walking down the street and I saw a man walking two big Irish Wolfhounds (or maybe not quite that big–my imagination may be exaggerating–but there were big and looked a lot like the picture of the wolfhound at wikipedia.) 

I was also on the phone talking to a friend that I hadn’t talked to in a while so my “dog” radar wasn’t as good as it should have been.  I did cut out to the street since Sadie really doesn’t like meeting other dogs when she is on the leash.  But in a instant both of the big dogs had broken their leashes and were coming for me and Sadie.  I ended up in the middle of three growling and snapping dogs.  Sadie was fighting back like a little trouper–trying to protect me.  I was trying to get her out of the middle.  The dog walker was trying to get his dogs back and all the while the dogs are mouthing at each other and making lots of noise. 

Fortunately a brave man in a pickup truck pulled over and started honking and got out of his truck to help.  It distracted the big dogs a bit and the dog walker and the man from the pick up were able to shoo the big dogs away from Sadie and I. 

The dog walker (who was kinda cute BTW) and the Good Samaratan  got the dogs to their home which was only 3 houses away.

 Sadie had slipped out of her collar and was squeaking like she was hurt.  Fortunately, not.  They had mouthed her fir and sacred both her and me but no injuries on either of our parts.  I put Sadie’s collar back on and ran my hands through her saliva soaked fir, telling her (and me) that we were okay. 

Sadie and I walked to the church parking lot and sat on the curb.  Both of us shaking.  The dog walker and my angel from the pick-up truck came to make sure we were okay.  I realized that for the dog walker, he had just experienced a nightmare too–dogs under his care loose going after another dog.  He sat on the ground apologizing to me and Sadie.  Calling Sadie, “Baby Girl”  and petting her reassuringly. 

I am so thankful.  Thankful that no one was hurt.  Thankful that none of the dogs got hit by a car when then went into there “tango” mode and were all off leash.  So grateful for the good Samaritan that stopped his truck to help. 

My poor friend Regina heard the whole thing on the phone.  I had to hang up to deal with Sadie and I know she was praying for me that I was okay.  I’m grateful for her good thoughts too.  She said it sounded like I was in the middle of a huge pack of dogs tearing each other apart.  Fortunately it was only loud–not deadly!

We are home now.  Sadie is acting like it never happened.  I envy dogs ability to stay in the moment and let things go.  Writing this is part of my process of letting it go.  As I sat down to write, I realized that what I needed to focus on was how everyone did the right thing and no one was hurt.  I realize the big dogs were more in goofy play mode than attack mode and everyone is fine.  A little adrenaline sure wakes you up though! 

Now if I had only gotten the dog walker’s name or card!

| Tags: dog attacks, dog walks, dogs, good samaratans, gratitude | Category: Lifestyle, Philosophy | Leave a comment

As I write this, I’m sitting on my back patio enjoying the beautiful day.  Sunday night and Monday, I spent some time with Shamans Don Martin Pinedo Acuna and Marco Nunez Zamalloa from Cusco, Peru.  I’ve always wanted to travel to Peru and go to Machu Picchu.  Years ago, I did a transformational breath work experience with Stan Grof and had an experience of being an Incan shaman woman.  So I was excited about the opportunity to experience a small taste of a shamanic experience.    

On Sunday, I traveled to Orange to attend an evening lecture, meditation and a beautiful ceremony called a Despacho Ceremony.  We each created our own “flower” of bay leaves (in Peru this would be coca leaves but for obvious reasons, they couldn’t bring coca leaves for all and rose petals and then breathed our intentions into our “flower.”  Then the flowers were collected and placed in circle and items to symbolize, wealth, abundance, happiness, connection etc were added to the offering.  I’m waiting to get a copy of a picture of our Despacho but until them here is a generic picture I found to give you an idea of what a Despacho looks like. 

Despacho

 We added our prayers and energy to the collection.  These prayers were “dispatched” to Pachamama (Mother Earth) and the spirits when the offering was burned later that evening.  It was a beautiful ritual, a touching way to share prayers for every one’s intentions.  Rituals speak to a part of our soul that language does not.  I was honored to be a part of this ceremony and it touched me deeply.  

On Monday, I had a personal healing session with both shamans.  I felt an energy shift after and I’ve been floating for a couple of days.  What impressed me about being in the presence of both of these shamans is how spiritual and real they are at the same time.  There was much joy and laughter as well as much wisdom shared.  I could write a couple of posts on this session but I am still integrating it and it feels like it should be held close to spirit right now.

For the last several years, I have wanted to study shamanic practices and healing with a group called the Four Winds. But the timing hasn’t been right.  This experience only reinforced my desire to experience more-including a trip to Peru. 

 It is enriching to step outside of what you know and experience the richness of the traditions of other cultures.  In the past few years I haven’t been able to travel as much as I would like.  But just because I choose not to travel doesn’t mean I can’t experience a taste of many of these cultures right here in my backyard.

| Tags: cermony, despacho ceremony, peru, shamans | Category: Reporting In, Spiritual | Leave a comment

I spent a beautiful weekend at a seminar in Capistrano Beach. (Productive Learning & Leisure’s: Beyond Reasons taught by the fabulous Jean O’Neill.) It reminded me that I need to not become the cobbler’s child, where I am so busy as a coach and hypnotherapist focusing on other people’s development that I don’t take time out to go to seminars and invest in my own development. We can know things in our heads but if we don’t take time to do them we never know them in our hearts or gut. And if we don’t take action on those items we learn they never become part of us.

I’m embarking on a new adventure. I’ve got the book far enough along that it is time to start making contacts for publishing and endorsements. The weekend was great in helping me turn a fear about asking for feedback from well-known authors to the idea of a grand adventure to see where the next phase of this book takes me.

Do you have a new step you need to take in life that has you scared? Something that is beyond your comfort zone? Something that has you saying, “I’m worried that I will do it wrong”? If you do, join me in turning that fear into curiosity: “I wonder what will happen when I take the next step?”

We don’t have to do it all today. Let’s look at our next steps as part of the grand adventure of life. MMMMmmmmm I wonder where that will take me today?

| Tags: adventure, Beyond Reasons, book, cobbler's children, doing your own work, Jean O'Neill, life as an adventure, PL&L, Productive Learning & Leisure, seminars | Category: Inspiration, Lifestyle, Philosophy | Leave a comment

I had one of those “oh shoot” experiences on Friday when I was parallel parking and scraped my tire against the curb and sliced the sidewall of the tire. Saturday, I spent two and a half hours waiting for two new tires to be installed and for the wheels to be aligned on my car.  I knew that I would be in for a wait because I didn’t get up early to be first in line at the tire place. I decided to just go when I was ready and practice patience and enjoy the luxury of being able to read a book for however long it took to fix the car.  After all, getting upset about however long it took to install the tires was not going to make the process go any faster. 

I grabbed the book Outliers by Malcolm Gladwell (author of Blink and The Tipping Point) that a client had lent me to read.   The time went by quickly as I read this book about the social and cultural reasons people are successful.  I noticed other people getting stressed about how long their cars were taking and I was in the delicious state of surrender where I allowed myself to enjoy where I was–in the waiting room of a busy Discount Tire Center in Pasadena–but I was creating my own world through the book I had with me.

I laughed as I got to a chapter in the book about Joe Flom.  I have worked at the law firm Skadden, Arps, Slate, Meagher & Flom for almost 20 years now.  (I am blessed to have a part-time affiliation with them to this day. It helps smooth out the cash flow ups and downs from being an entrepreneur.)  Yes, the Flom in the firm name is Joe Flom.  I found out things about the firm and Joe Flom that I didn’t know from working there.  It gave me a whole different perspective on the firm culture. 

But more interesting than my encounter with a familiar name in the book was the way Gladwell probed deeper into the success stories.  In most success stories there are common themes to the story: Some one is a “genius,”   “he pulled himself up by the bootstraps”  or “look at how lucky she was.” We love stories of self-made people. But deeper than that is how the culture around a person can help him or her be successful. 

It was an interesting read when you start thinking about education.  If a child comes from a culture or home environment that doesn’t value education or the parents don’t have time or the understanding to reinforce the importance of learning–the child has a much harder road.

By the time the car was done, I was halfway though the book.  I finished it last night before bed. 

If you are looking for a quick and interesting read about success, grab this book.  It got me thinking about how we define success and what we can do as a community to help others be more successful. That is quite an accomplishment while sitting at Discount Tires!

| Tags: Choosing Positive Thoughts, Discount Tire Center, Flat Tire, Making the Best Use of Time, Malcolm Gladwell, Outliers, Patience | Category: Inspiration, Reporting In | Leave a comment

Sometimes we forget the obvious things!  Carol just reminded me that I have not been sharing these monthly articles with you all.  Those of you who live in Santa Clarita may have seen them in the local paper - The Signal, although I know many people who do not subscribe, so maybe not.

In any case, here are some links to the past couple (they are up on the internet), and I’ll remember to link you in on the future ones.  The next one actually goes in Friday.

Enjoy!

Karen

Get a New Point of View to Ditch Stressful Thoughts - March 2009

Try Acting With Kindness as an Alternative to Stress

| Tags: articles, eliminate stress, kindness, point of view, Stress, Stress management, stress redi=uction, stress reduction, The Signal | Category: In the News, Stress | Leave a comment

In reading Carol’s post on authenticity, I was moved to muse a bit myself - on the concept of responsibility.  A couple weeks ago, I had this word re-framed for me by a wonderful Reiki practitioner that is now sharing my office - Joan O’Brien of Healing Hands Reiki. 

First a little background.  I have always been one of those people who feels responsible to take care of things.  Pretty much everything going on around me.  I do it without even thinking about it anymore.  When I encounter clients with this trait, I speak about them having the R-gene like I do, and we often work on balancing that tendency, because it is one that goes to excess all too easily, and then causes internal and external life issues.

Joan’s counsel to me was to start holding the thought that what I am most responsible for is ensuring that my gifts are shared with the world, that I be true to my heart, and that this responsibility is greater for each of us than taking care of things for everyone else (which can rob them of the opportunity to do what they need to do anyway - a whole other Oprah!).

I really like this.  Now to get it into practice.  I have been doing some of the other things she wants me to do - going outside in the morning and standing barefoot on the ground and connecting, taking back my space (more on that later), and I actually got up early this morning and before I even looked at my computer, I drew a little picture.  I’d love to hear from any of you out there on how you stopped being so responsible for everyone and everything and became more responsible for yourself and your dreams.  Let’s help each other be this new kind of responsible.

Love, Karen

| Tags: Add new tag, authenticity, connecting, Healing Hands Reiki, Inspiration, Joan O'Brien, letting go, re-framing, Responsibility | Category: Inspiration, Philosophy | Leave a comment

By now you know I’m a sucker for animal videos.  A friend send me a link to this one at YouTube today.  And of course, it make me cry–so sweet!  I love the gentleness and trust on the part of both the deer and the cat!

That was great start to my day! Have a great weekend everyone!

Hugs!
Carol

| Tags: animal videos, cat, deer, Louis Armstrong, What a Wonderful World | Category: Inspiration | Leave a comment